A guest post by Tash. I was 33 when I decided to pursue motherhood alone. I’m pretty much a ‘glass half full’ kinda gal, but after years of bland blind dates and demoralising Tinder swipes even I had to be realistic and accept that maybe not everyone finds their soul mate. I quickly realised […]
Category: Pregnancy after loss
Guest monologue: Every pregnancy is different…so is every pregnancy loss
Last week, I launched a new guest blog series (you can catch up here, if you missed it) sharing different perspectives on miscarriage and pregnancy loss. All kinds of loss and all kinds of voices. Here, Hayley, who writes the blog Life. Love. Loss, shares her story…. I can remember reading, in some pregnancy booklet […]
‘Just take a holiday…’
Often when we describe pregnancy loss as a taboo, what we really mean, I think, isn’t so much that it’s completely unmentionable – or impossible to admit to – and more that we feel other people have no idea what our lives are like afterwards. That sense of feeling invisible and not properly understood can […]
Guest monologue: The joys of now
This guest post landed at exactly the right moment for me. I’ve been feeling a bit low – perhaps because we’re into the run-up to Mother’s Day here in the UK – and I’ve found myself dwelling on what I don’t have and what I haven’t done. After miscarriage and baby loss (and to a […]
How to beat the miscarriage malgorithms
It’s an internet truth universally acknowledged that a person in possession of a womb must be in want of a pregnancy test. Or an ovulation stick. Or perhaps some adorable matching mama-and-baby leggings. The internet knows when you’re pregnant. Or, at least, it has very strong ideas about when you should be pregnant. I got my […]
Comfort and Joy (Pregnancy announcements: A how-to)
I was going to write a different post for the week before Christmas. About how Dan and I are trying to wring every last drop of joy from the festive season this year, my first not working – not on Christmas Day, not on Boxing Day, not on any of those surreal, time-passing-slow-as-treacle days in […]
Making space for a life
Not long after my first miscarriage I interviewed a brilliant psychologist, who specializes in pregnancy loss and infertility, for an article I was writing. I think I will always remember that conversation – how she managed to send some splinters of light through what was otherwise a blinds-drawn, shutters-down kind of time in my life. […]
Normal heart: A fourth miscarriage
There is a print on the wall of the ultrasound room in the unit where they run our recurrent miscarriage clinic. It’s of a red heart, drawn in a swirly, slightly abstract way. Possibly it says ‘amour’ underneath in faux-romantic script. When I’m there, I always think I should make a note of what it […]
The negatives of positive thinking
Stay positive. Just relax. Don’t stress. How often do you hear these things in relation to pregnancy or trying to conceive? I know they’re words well meant. But, actually, I find this always-look-on-brightside philosophy supremely unhelpful when it’s foisted upon me. In fact, nothing is guaranteed to fill me with more rage and general ill […]