I’ve written before about what I did (and didn’t) do differently in my fifth pregnancy, which gave me Edward. The TL:DR version being: I took progesterone, and changed absolutely nothing else/ tried to be as relaxed about all other lifestyle minutiae as possible. More than two years on from that post, the questions I get […]
Category: pregnancy
Pregnancy after loss – a (gentle) survival guide
By the time you read this, it’ll have been more than a year since I was pregnant. This is only the second time this has been true in – what? – five years, now. The last time I could say it was when we took an extended break from trying to conceive after our fourth […]
Why we need miscarriage leave (like New Zealand)
The day after my first miscarriage, I sat in a shopping centre Costa with my mum, who urged me to email my boss asking for time off. It was a Sunday and because I hadn’t really known what else to do, we’d come to the shops. The excuse was I needed a new winter coat, […]
Any day now
Will this be the week I give birth? Could it be tomorrow or later today, even? One way or the other, it will be this month, at least. Somehow, I still can’t wrap my head around the idea. My mum messaged me the other day, checking in, and said how this time last year I […]
On beauty and terror
Here is a sentence I almost daren’t write: In less than three months’ time, I will have a baby. My official due date is no longer a vague point on a hazy horizon but galloping into sharp focus. Not that you’d guess as much, were you to ask us how the preparations are going. Dan […]
COVID-19: Some fears and some facts
It’s difficult to know what to write at times like these. My anxiety that something will go wrong with this pregnancy (our fifth) reached new heights this week. It’s been surreal feeling my nebulous, shapeless worries harden into concrete, very real fears in the face of the COVID-19 pandemic. Will I still be able to have […]
Guest monologue: I wish I could be friends with my womb, but I’m not
A guest post by Katie @withoutottilie Me and my womb aren’t exactly the best of friends. I love being a woman. And yet the one physical organ that defines my womanhood, has caused me nothing but pain. Our difficult relationship started on 28th February 1989, my Mum’s birthday, when I was 11. I knew about periods because […]
Guest monologue: ‘It was a decision, not a choice’
After the Tommy’s Together For Change campaign launch last week, Laura from the blog Laura After Loss messaged me to ask if I would consider posting about an aspect of baby loss that you very rarely hear about, even in articles about pregnancy loss – termination for medical reasons. It is, as she put it, […]
Normal heart: A fourth miscarriage
There is a print on the wall of the ultrasound room in the unit where they run our recurrent miscarriage clinic. It’s of a red heart, drawn in a swirly, slightly abstract way. Possibly it says ‘amour’ underneath in faux-romantic script. When I’m there, I always think I should make a note of what it […]