The finish line

Jennie, The Uterus Monologues, LLHM, half marathon, Tommy's fundraising

And just like that, the due date for pregnancy number three has passed. In my head this was a big milestone. That somehow once it was behind us it would feel like freedom. Release. A neat conclusion to this over-long, unhappy chapter. The end. Fin. But, of course, there is no finish line to this… Continue reading The finish line

No news is good news

‘I’ll say this straight away,’ the consultant says as he pushes opens the door to his office. ‘I’m not going to tell you anything bad. It’s not bad news. ‘All the tests results came back negative. We didn’t find anything. And that’s good. I’ll quickly explain why.’ He starts rattling through all the different clotting… Continue reading No news is good news

Bad days

Last week was a bad week. Not so much the blues as the mean reds, as Holly Golightly has it. Suddenly you’re afraid and you don’t know what you’re afraid of. The 14th marked a whole year since our first miscarriage. And while I’m feeling a bit brighter now, I thought I would take the opportunity… Continue reading Bad days

Not pregnant, not drinking

Back in November, just as most sensible people were gearing up for the Christmas onslaught of office parties, lunchtime mulled wine, and endless oh-go-on-then prosecco, I decided to stop drinking. I did 30 completely dry days to start with. Then gave myself a bit of leeway for a couple of parties and work events, but… Continue reading Not pregnant, not drinking

Book review: Trying by Emily Phillips

A few pages into Trying, I had to close it and put it down. Not because it wasn’t good. It is. Really good, in fact. But it was painful, too. The flashes of recognition hit me with a force that was almost like being winded. I needed a second to catch my breath. As you… Continue reading Book review: Trying by Emily Phillips

Hey jealousy: The unbearable envy that comes with miscarriage

'Clear your diaries, get the time booked off... I’m not sure how much news this really is, but anyway, it’s April.’ With these wry words the BBC’s Simon McCoy announced the due date of the Duchess of Cambridge’s third child. April. I took a deep breath. Why did it have to be April? My baby was supposed… Continue reading Hey jealousy: The unbearable envy that comes with miscarriage

The box under the bed: making miscarriage visible

The problem with miscarriage is that as well as being silent – i.e. no one really talks about it – it’s also invisible. Often there’s been no pregnancy announcement, there was no visible bump, no scan pictures, no ‘gender reveal’; no evidence at all, in fact, that there ever was a baby. And it’s hard… Continue reading The box under the bed: making miscarriage visible