By Steph (@crossing_everything) I thought my days of crying in work toilets were over. But a few months ago, when an unsolicited scan picture with the cheery caption ‘baby no.2 on the way!’ appeared on my phone, I was right back there. Silently crying in a soulless toilet cubicle, jealous of the simplicity of a […]
In the days after my son was born, I would catch myself gazing around our house in wonder. Cards covered every surface, flowers spilled out of every vase we owned, while stacks of gifted baby clothes sat waiting to be put away. After four years of trying for a baby and four miscarriages we had […]
It seems a bit mad that my – * checks notes * – third proper post since Edward was born is about the question of having another child, but I think the single most surprising thing for me about having a baby has been how quickly people ask when you’re going to do it all over again. […]
Since Edward was born, I find myself thinking in ways I promised myself I never would. It started with: Slow down. Stop growing! (Words that used to pierce like flint before, when I’d see other mums write them on social media, never for a second considering what it’s like when your baby does literally stop growing). Now, […]
We are both crying so hard I start to think we might have to pull the car over. It is Christmas Eve 2018 and we’re driving to my mum’s. It’s been six months since my fourth miscarriage. To brighten up our 40-mile pilgrimage up the A1(M), we’ve had bakery coffee, cinnamon buns, and Dan’s annual […]
Just a short note to introduce you to Edward, our son, who arrived last week – all of a sudden and at long last. He is truly the brightest of rainbows after a storm. Born during a global pandemic, conceived when hope was fading, after four miscarriages and their attendant grief, which had settled over […]
A guest post by Zoe (@motherof__pearl). In the darkness of night, I wake, sweating, my heart hammering. The room is silent. I try to place myself for a second, but my body is already in motion, leaning over, turning on the lamp, peering at his chest before my mind has caught up, watching for that […]
The Uterus Monologues: Miscarriage, motherhood and me 